I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
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i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
No...this little piggys going to the bar
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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