so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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