fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
