i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize