oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
vagina is talking i cant
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
