hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
