spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
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