I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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