To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
