I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
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