I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
