This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
