Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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