You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
