So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize