One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
