i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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