Where is the hickey?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
