break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
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A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
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My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.