i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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