butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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