Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
If that was your dad, he is hot
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize