afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
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His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
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Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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