What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
