He had one of those small greek statue penises
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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