I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
