I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize