How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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