Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
