R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
