so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
