I feel like I'm in dance class right now
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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