I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Randomize
