Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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