Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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