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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  i can respect that.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.

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• 

  25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (803): View more from South Carolina

  I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...

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• (623): View more from Arizona

  Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?

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• (949): View more from California

  July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary

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  25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information

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• (868): View more from Trinidad and Tobago-Carib

  Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...

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• (646): View more from New York

  I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE

  (646): View more from New York

  HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT

  (646): View more from New York

  GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT

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