saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
