the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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