Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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