is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
