It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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