I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize