did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I met the friendliest cop last night
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap