She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize