So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
