I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
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