why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
