Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
