tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
