He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Randomize